This Tall
So everyone has been saying to me in pointed fashion, "You're still going to blog, right?" And to one and all I reply, No. Never again. I'm through with this blogging thing forever.
Kidding. However, there is this issue now. For the entire month of May it was understood, sometimes implicitly and sometimes very explicitly, that I was blogging to meet my daily requirement, and if I didn't have anything in particular to say I was damn well going to say it anyway. But now if I put something up, it's because I have a point to make. It's like having a dinner party as opposed to cooking something on a Tuesday night after work so we don't go to bed hungry. Doing the blogathon absolved me of all fear of self-importance. It was like the opposite of irony. (Wait... what? Well, I knew what I meant when I typed it a second ago.)
So just to throw off that yoke of heaviness, I'd like to share something with you, my readers:
I bank at HSBC, and every HSBC branch in the city has this tape mounted to the side of every exit door, with heights from 4'-6" to 6'-6" calibrated on it. Presumably there is a security camera aimed straight at it so as to record any criminals on their way out. And for years and years now, without fail -- probably on the average of twice a month -- I have never walked out of an HSBC bank without saying to myself, "You must be THIS TALL to rob the bank." And, silently, laughing my fool head off for a moment.
So now you know just how deeply dorky I am. I hope you people are satisfied.
Kidding. However, there is this issue now. For the entire month of May it was understood, sometimes implicitly and sometimes very explicitly, that I was blogging to meet my daily requirement, and if I didn't have anything in particular to say I was damn well going to say it anyway. But now if I put something up, it's because I have a point to make. It's like having a dinner party as opposed to cooking something on a Tuesday night after work so we don't go to bed hungry. Doing the blogathon absolved me of all fear of self-importance. It was like the opposite of irony. (Wait... what? Well, I knew what I meant when I typed it a second ago.)
So just to throw off that yoke of heaviness, I'd like to share something with you, my readers:
I bank at HSBC, and every HSBC branch in the city has this tape mounted to the side of every exit door, with heights from 4'-6" to 6'-6" calibrated on it. Presumably there is a security camera aimed straight at it so as to record any criminals on their way out. And for years and years now, without fail -- probably on the average of twice a month -- I have never walked out of an HSBC bank without saying to myself, "You must be THIS TALL to rob the bank." And, silently, laughing my fool head off for a moment.So now you know just how deeply dorky I am. I hope you people are satisfied.
Labels: confessional
posted by Lisa at 10:27 PM
9 Comments:
I love it. You are the Best Dork Ever.
I revel in your dorkdom.
That must totally be a New York thing. I've never ever seen a height tape thing in the bank, and now I'm going to look for one whenever I go in a new bank (which doesn't happen that often). And if I do ever see one, I'll have no choice but to think "this tall" and think of you!
Ha! I love that.
Signed,
A Fellow Dork
I only wish my bank cared how tall I am. But no, they'll let me ride the economy roller-coaster even if I'm only knee-high.
Now I am going nuts trying to recall what recent novel or memoir with a male narrator has a mention of this. I think the writer is British.
For months I have wondered what it is that HSBC wants with this! (BTW, we do bank at the same bank - another unintended similarilty!). My recent attempt to switch to another banking monster has ended in a failure - I don't know if I was too short or too tall for those other guys, but apparently for HSBC I'm "just right". My husband is apparently, too tall at 6'4", so he successfully left their fold a couple years ago. I think this is one of the most arcane trains of thought I have pursuied lately! Please keep blogging - believe me, this well is far from dry!
I used to see those at 7-11s and wondered what they were for the longest time. One day it just clicked.
And here I thought it was a growth chart for the tellers.
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